BSIP / UIG via GettyNo, we don’t mean that advertisers went into the lab and genetically engineered herpes in order to sell herpes medication. We mean they invented the idea that herpes was a thing that people should worry about.

Don’t worry, only 85 percent of people can expect to catch this.
Well, how can that be possible? After all, chances are that when you hear the word “herpes,” the first thing you think of isn’t cold sores. No, your mind immediately jumps to oozing, pulsating herpes sores all over your junk. On the list of places where itchy, nasty sores would be most inconvenient, your wang (or your lady wang) comes in second only to “all up in your asshole.” But it gets worse — not only are the sores disgusting, but you also have to deal with the negative social stigma of herpes that comes along with having the “crotch rot.” People with herpes live in constant fear of others knowing it, sometimes becoming depressed, joining herpes support groups, even contemplating freaking suicide. Of course we should all be worried about herpes, right? It’s a disease!
BUT it actually came from …
Back in 1975, Burroughs Wellcome developed a drug that helped herpes sufferers by relieving their symptoms. The good people at Wellcome had one problem, though: The world gave precisely zero fucks about their new drug.

“A little blue pill that doesn’t make my dick hard? No thanks.”
How is this possible, you ask? Didn’t people have herpes back then? Well, the disease has been around for freaking ever — 2,000 years, if we’re going by the first time someone scratched his balls and then decided to make note of it on official record — but the thing is that herpes, both oral and genital, was never really seen as anything more than a sore in an inconvenient place, no more embarrassing than a zit. Herpes was so insignificant that common medical textbooks of the day didn’t even mention it. Hence, when people came down with sores on their mouth or down where the sun don’t shine, they didn’t think twice about it, not even realizing that these sores had a special name.

Jupiterimages/Comstock/Getty Images
“I just covered up with a giant hippie bush and figured that was the end of it.”
But then Burroughs Wellcome had a bright idea for how to market their drug for a disease nobody had heard of or cared about: They launched an ad campaign educating people about the difference between a normal cold sore and a “stigmatized genital infection,” which would make others treat you as if you had come down with a case of radioactive crotch.
The ads worked wonders. People with herpes felt (and to this day continue to feel) ashamed that they’d come down with it. They bought the drug in droves — a drug which, by the way, obviously did not cure herpes. Burroughs Wellcome thus came to invent what’s known today as “disease mongering,” which is basically making you feel like a social dipshit because of a common physical illness — sadly, a move that likely doesn’t even break the top five list of douchiest moves by pharmaceutical companies.

Jupiterimages/Creatas/Getty Images
“We’re renaming acne ‘deathface murderplague.’ That should do the trick.”
The tattoo of the lotus flower on my right shoulder.Halloween 2009, three months after my rape and one month after my herpes diagnosis, I decided to get a lotus tattoo on my right shoulder. The lotus flower grows in the mud in shallow water and does not bloom until it reaches the surface. While it’s growing, the flower petals are safe inside the blossom, which keeps them from getting stained by the mud. I always loved the symbolism of the lotus flower, but I didn’t realize how accurate the metaphor was for me until about two years later. I battled my anger, my resentment, and my self-consciousness many times over those two years. Healing is not a linear path. There are twists and turns, forks and loops. It took a lot of tears, many sleepless nights, and a lot of support to get me to where I am now.Underneath the lotus is a Tibetan Buddhist mantra: “Om Mani Padme Hum.” This mantra is a devotion to Avalokiteshvara, the bodhisattva of compassion. It serves as a daily reminder that I cannot know where someone else has been or what has led them to this point. It encourages me to show compassion to others as well as myself.Thanks to Adrial and the Herpes Opportunity, I found the strength to “come out” about having herpes. I told my friends, family, and the internet. I have to say, I have never felt so free in my entire life. It feels wonderful to be able to speak openly about having herpes, instead of saying the word in hushed tones while constantly looking over my shoulder wondering who might be listening and judging. I look forward to talking about herpes during my weekly Skype call with Adrial. I get excited that other people will see our videos and hopefully crack a smile or giggle at our silliness. I feel genuine and authentic, which is a huge improvement over the way I felt when I was still “in the yuck.”